Women's Media Nation | Social, political, and cultural issues relating to women

Fighting Cyber Bullying: A more serious issue than it seems

posted by ChickSpeak
Wednesday, March 3, 2010 at 12:32pm CST

I was intently watching Teen Mom on MTV when I was overcome with irritation due to the fact that a commercial break interrupted a seriously intense moment. With no other choice but to stare at the screen and wait for my show to come back on, I sat listening to why Proactiv is the best product out there. Wondering what would be advertised next, I furrowed my eyebrows and tilted my head at what appeared - what was this commercial?

A young boy sits in a chair at a tattoo parlor. Covered already with words like “loser,” “moron,” and “freak,” his phone rings and he says to the artist, “I just got another one…looks like we’re doing ‘worthless’ next. I think there’s some room on my back.” The close up shot that follows captures the hurt he’s feeling as tears begin to well up in his eyes.

This commercial is no joke - it’s about cyber bullying.

According to StopCyberBullying, cyber bullying is “when a child, preteen or teen is tormented, threatened, harassed, humiliated, embarrassed or otherwise targeted by another child, preteen or teen using the Internet, interactive and digital technologies or mobile phones. It has to have a minor on both sides, or at least have been instigated by a minor against another minor. Once adults become involved, it is plain and simple cyber-harassment or cyberstalking.”

Whether you want to admit it or not, chicks, you may have been a cyber bully at one time or another. Have you ever called your best friend a nasty name when you were mad at her? Ever insulted your sibling via text to your friends when was annoying you beyond belief? Sorry to say it but whether you were in the heat of the moment or not, you were bullying - and it’s not right.

While it may hurt you that you were once the person responsible for bringing someone else down, what feels even worse is being the victim herself.

If this has happened to you, you may recall feeling helpless and alone. But that’s just the thing - you aren’t alone in this. There have been cases all over the country regarding cyber bullying and some have been worse than others. Two such cases are the “Megan Meier MySpace Incident” and the “Kill Kylie Campaign of Hate and Homophobia.”

When 13-year-old Megan Meier set up her MySpace account and befriended who she thought was a boy that was new to her neighborhood, she would have never thought that on the other end was a group of children and adults alike who were criticizing her for a past friendship that hadn’t turned out so well. When she eventually realized that she was being fooled, she took it to heart as many would and later committed suicide. In light of the situation, several state governments passed laws about the offense.

Kylie Kenney’s case lasted from her eighth grade year to her sophomore year. Assuming the young girl was a homosexual, fellow classmates created horrid websites and screen-names that suggested it was Kylie speaking, and sent sexual advances to girls on her field hockey team. Kylie was one of the strong ones - she unfortunately dealt with the torture until police finally filed harassment charges on those who were responsible.

While both of these girls are a lot younger than our audience at ChickSpeak, it doesn’t mean this type of bullying doesn’t exist. There are many chicks out there who are as catty as ever and they don’t care who they hurt. They’ll send out demeaning texts, emails, and wall posts to their friends, suggesting you’re the worst thing to have ever hit this earth.

These chicks are cruel and you need to know how to handle them:

Don’t Fight Fire with Fire

For starters, don’t respond to your bully’s attacks. The old saying sticks - if you don’t feed into the bully, they’ll back off. They’re seeking power, control, and a way to alleviate their low self-esteem. Don’t show them you’re emotionally hurt and bothered - you’ll only further provoke them.

Keep the Evidence

Next, you need to make sure you don’t delete any proof you have of cyber bullying. If the bully is sending you messages online, via text, or by calling you, they can be traced. So much for anonymity, eh? With proof, you’re setting your bully up for a little bit of karma.

Report it ASAP

The last and most important thing to do is report the incident. You may be afraid that it’ll lead to negative repercussions but if you hide forever and let them go without consequence, you’ve gotten nowhere. Do what you know is right - tell someone about what’s happening. You’d be surprised how much it’ll help.

Cyber bullying is a permanent, painful thing, chicks. Be nice and beware.

Chelsea Tirrell is a freshman at Hofstra University. She’s inevitably spewed a negative word or two (no one’s perfect), but she’s aware of the harms and steers clear of cyber bullying. Aside from being an aspiring magazine journalist, she hopes to be an author and wants to establish “Books for Causes.” In one of these books, she’d love to cover this issue.